Acting out (noun):
- A (usually irritating) impulsive and uncontrollable outburst by a problem child or a neurotic adult.
- (Psychiatry) the display of previously inhabited emotions (often in actions rather than words); considered to be healthy and therapeutic.
I used to have a friend that I could talk to anytime, about anything. Then one day, he just cut all ties with me.
So, as someone with separation and trust issues, I felt so betrayed, hurt, down, and angry. I took it hard. I did everything I could to manage all the negative emotions I had (and still have to this day). But as ordinary human, I could only do so much. Sometimes I failed, hard.
For the record, I've always been so vindictive as long as I could remember. I hold grudges like no body's business. And the worst part is, I have literally no one I could talk to about how I felt and went through.
So, I flipped out. I went ballistic crazy and did all sort of things that normal people, in their right minds, won't even think of.
I had done it before, once. It was not pretty.
My acting out this time, is nothing. Yeah, trust me, this time it's nothing compare to what I have done before. I did things I'm not proud of. If someone did things that I did, to me, I'd sue the hell of my own ass.
To be clear, this is not an explanation, or even an apology.
Picture was borrowed from here.